Busy Bees

You know that scene in movies where the character has something heavy weighing on their mind and is shown just staring off into the distance, contemplating?  When did we get too busy to do that?  When did life become too hectic to take that time? When did our schedules stop allowing for deep thought? This is not to say that I don’t have deep thoughts – only that my processing speed is much faster.  If something comes along that can’t be dealt with in a swift and efficient manner, then it gets pushed away (and likely never dealt with).  When did we stop thinking and start living so automatically? 

Recently someone pretty close to me has been noticeably living on auto-pilot.  Things aren’t being thought through, people aren’t being considered, actions are simply taken and if it’s pointed out that the action was incorrect, she looks startled – like you just, briefly, woke her up. But then she switches right back to auto-pilot. It was this behavior that made me realize that, in general, people are far too busy OR just feel the need to be busy and aren’t allowing any time for thought.

I do have to throw some blame on to our obsession with social media for this. How often do people sit in their own bathrooms on the toilet and NOT scroll through their phones?  When do you see people standing in a long line NOT flipping through facebook or Instagram?  Yet the blame can’t go on these platforms alone. It’s us. It’s our need to be nosy, our need for instant gratification, our inability to have any self-control and put the phone down. 

A long time ago, when I lived a few states away, I had a lovely little townhouse. The townhouse had a dining room. Now this dining room was the size of a large bathroom, it was pretty small, but it was…well, it was lovely.  It was an off white, beige carpeting, very neutral. Our table was also an off white. At Christmas, I would put this pretty little runner on the table and a white and silver Santa standing tall in the middle.  It was very simple and I loved it. When it would snow and evening would come, the window would cast this lovely white/blue evening hue to the room and I couldn’t think of a more peaceful place to be.  I would sit in that room then, sometimes just gazing out the window, sometimes with a book, and I would just enjoy the ambiance and the magic of the season (now the season brings mostly depression unfortunately).  Now I know, social media wasn’t a thing then (yes I’m really old, let’s not discuss that), but there was something so peaceful about that – enough to always make it stick in my mind.   

I get it though – slowing down is hard (for some people – apparently way too easy for others).  I had surgery last Friday – a surgery that took out my functionality for the weekend and will continue to affect it for another 8 weeks or so.  Sunday, 2 days after surgery, was the worst pain and I could barely move around at all. Depression hit big time because I’m used to moving constantly. I looked around my house, realizing that very little would be done unless I could do it and that, honestly, caused even more depression. On top of that though, I was bored. I wanted to be up and moving. Sure I caught up on a couple shows, but even those bored me, because that’s not what I would have normally been doing then. Even the idea of reading, which I complain about never having enough time to do, was so unappealing, because it was not my norm. It was not my usual multi-tasking.

The thing is…all this scrolling and social media time makes us feel even more busy than we actually are.  ‘Oh I hardly ever have time to read’.  Really?  You couldn’t have read for 10 minutes on the toilet instead of scrolling through TikTok?   ‘I’m just so busy, I don’t have any time to slow down’.  Is that true though?  It rarely is the actual case. Social media makes us feel busier.  We try to cram an hour’s worth of scrolling into that 15 minute break. It’s not actually satisfying in any way, leaves us craving more and often leaves us feeling a little edgy, even if we don’t realize it. 

I’m asking for everyone, this weekend, to take that time. Take a minute to admire your child. Take a minute to look at the beautiful leaves turning. Take a minute to sit at your table with a cup of coffee and just reflect. Take a minute to talk to a friend or family member. No screens, no social media, no distraction. 

 

PS - I know this is kind of clunky today, and for that, I apologize. My own mind sometimes refuses to slow down and take in the sights.